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Sunday, 25 February 2007
Quickly I run through the hallway of my dreams. Visions of pain and death preceed me. While picking up the razor blade angels fall down. They've seen me like this before. Who knows what can happen now? It breaks through my skin, and I slowly go more insane. Grim images and tragic memories appear in my mind. I know that what I'm doing is right. The angels can take away the blade and pick themselves up, but still I will go on. I know what I'm doing. And I know it's right. Still I cut deeper, just to make sure I can feel. With so much pain in my life, it's hard to figure out which is real and which is merely my imagination. But tell me that you're alright, and I'll put up my front. I'll build my wall up once again and act like everything's alright. "Hey,call the angels, this razor blade was meant for me." "Hey, call the angles, we'll mutilate insanity."
Posted by geneticdeisgn4dying
at 1:04 PM EST
Come love, and find eternity with me. Changing from just one bite, the moon is now our sun. Lay and sleep. Sleep away the day. For tonight, we find more. Let the blood drip, there's no use for a knife. Come love, and find eternity with me. Find immortality. Find a life. A true life. A life that tells of sleepless nights and slumberfilled days. Drink the juice of life, and know that you will live forever. Come love, and find eternity with me.
Posted by geneticdeisgn4dying
at 10:42 AM EST
Saturday, 24 February 2007
I never wanted this to happen. To see you on the floor. Never wanted this to happen. It's not like before. But before wasn't right either. But atleast we had our lies. We could hide behind those again. If you would just get up. We could hide again. If you would just. Get. Up.
Posted by geneticdeisgn4dying
at 3:21 PM EST
By no means am I pretty. By no means am I right. But by any means necessary, I will die tonight. Beaten and bruised. Scarred and torn. Wishes of death precede me, wishes that I'd never been born. Let's lie in the dark and pretend that I'm not. That I'm not only here for one more day. That I'm here forever. That I'm here to stay. Remarkable as it seems, I do have a soul. It's tired and weary. But none the less, it's dark and it's dreary. Told so many lies. Told nothing of what's true. I'm down in my corner, and hiding behind you. I don't want this to end. But everything must. Ashes to ashes. Dust to dust. Tell me the lies one more time. And maybe I'll believe. Tell me your lies, and promise not to deceive. "Such a pretty face; such a dark secret." I never said I was perfect. So just forget me like everyone else. Let me be alone. Let me die alone. And just. Let. Me. Go.
Posted by geneticdeisgn4dying
at 3:12 PM EST
Thoughts of my death haunt me. And just when I think I'm fine, tears fall again. I am left unwhole by the thought of never seeing light. I am left unwhole by never knowing what is right. I am forgotten here, but not by my own thoughts. My thoughts. Such tragedy and despair. Such. Depression. Forgotten by many. Remembered by few. I am debt; in debt to you. My refuge; my rock; my everlasting light. What is it? Death. Never knowing purity. Never knowing truth. Never knowing anything. Anything but sorrow. Sorrow filled thoughts lead me closer to the edge. But at the edge is what I've waited for for so long. So let's rebuild my bridge back. Back into tomorrow.
Posted by geneticdeisgn4dying
at 3:05 PM EST
Welcome death, and it will welcome you. Fall into it's arms, and you are forever gone. Take your rightful place under the dirt, and feel no regret. You've done nothing wrong. Nothing but die. Let the moist soil bury you deep. Deep. Deep down. Let your coffin door remain shut now and for eternity. And let death be your family. Now and forever. Let death embrace you in it's arms. For that is your place. Your place and mine. Let's share death. Let's share time. Because my timely death, is also yours.
Posted by geneticdeisgn4dying
at 2:48 PM EST
Leave me here to die! Leave me here til my cuts bleed again. I wan tto feel the sweet pain. Painful thoughts, painful tears, and painful memories. My life is revenge. Revenge for my self inflicted pain. But the carvings show me the darkest things: my thougts. Let the angel of death spread his wings. Let me huddle under the right wing and find my place. I belong there, so let me find my place. My place to die. "For the wage of sin is death." But if we are all sinners; do we not all deserve death? Are we not all worthy of such a punishment to put us out of our woefilled lives? Are we kept here as a punishment? "For the wage of sin is death." "For the wage of sin is death."
Posted by geneticdeisgn4dying
at 2:41 PM EST
And the prophecy is fulfilled. I am carried away by my angel: a demon. I have never been one to be remembered; much less yearned for. So don't ache for me. For I have done nothing worthy of you. I have sinned, I have lied, and I have fallen short. But do not weep, for I know my place. My place is far from here; from you. I am lost in this sea. The sea of dark. You've never been one to weep; but tears fall from your face. Do not weep for me, for I have done nothing worthy of you.
Posted by geneticdeisgn4dying
at 2:37 PM EST
Let the candle flicker; for its light is beautiful. Let the candle flicker; for it hides the truth. The light that shines hides my transgressions. And in it; I am made whole. In the light, I am not broken. But together. I am free in this light. This everlasting light. Blood comes from the candle. And the blood comes from me. I am lost in this everlasting light. This light that has kept me together. Let the candle flicker, for it brings me back. Let the candle flicker, because then, you can't see what I lack.
Posted by geneticdeisgn4dying
at 2:33 PM EST
Let it be known: I am immortal. Let it be known: I am evil. I've never really been true, to my family; to you. I've never told a soul; but mine is gone. Let all of the blood, the tears, and my hopes be taken away at the break of light. And let all that remains be nothing in sight. I want to break free; free from the pact. I want to break free; free from my Hell.
Posted by geneticdeisgn4dying
at 2:30 PM EST
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